leave the room to cry.

today i cradled a pair of blades
in my tired, tired lap
and i cried, sobbed,
remembered.

i am cold fingerprints on
rain-flecked glasses and
i am ingesting all your shields
within my wicked bowels
so that when you next lay down
your bones will melt into my voice.

but you are an unstoppable
Force
and you can crumple Lives
with one look
and i love you but what really
matters here
is that he loves you
and somehow i am still
without a square
but searching for one in my own
retinas
because he told me he saw
tigers there, once.

my sidewalk is grown over like
childhood socks
and the sun makes it look as if
it is slowly decaying
and i imagine that's exactly how
i look in the sun:
rotting
soon
to
be
useless
even for you to walk on me.